Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Practice

          My natural response to anything going wrong is to worry....it always has been one of the things I struggle with the most.  Even if it's not the end of the world (which I guess includes everything I've ever worried about) I have to work really hard not to fall into the same path of worry and anxiety.  I knew with this adoption that there would be times where I was challenged in this respect and I also have purposed to keep my focus on Christ and that He is in control.  I've been trying to wait patiently to hear back on the status of our dossier and whether or not all of our effots to get everything done just right had paid off or not.  Today I received an e-mail that there were a few things that needed to be corrected and my initial response was discouragement and....worry!  Some of the documents are easy to fix, while others take time and require us to rely on others to get things done so my mind started going, thinking of all the possible problems.  So here's where I caught myself, stopped and thought that maybe for once I could use a stressful situation to practice being calm, trusting God and not worrying!  Philippians 4:6-7, which I memorized forever ago in my attempt to work on this flaw, immediately came to mind and for once I was not overcome with anxiety.  Even typing this, it seems completely ridiculous, but it's something that I find difficult.
           Our case manager is amazing and complimented us on completing our dossier very well.  One issue is an easy fix, but the other requires us to rely on our other agency where we have already experienced some problems and a great deal of delay.  It was probably what I wanted to hear the least in terms of problems, and yet because I was not already all caught up in worry and sick to my stomach, it did not seem like that big of a deal.  I was instantly reminded of the fact that this is all going to happen in God's timing anyway and there are so many potential reasons why this delay, or any, could be happening.  I can't see the big picture, but thankfully God has a bird's eye view and is in complete control.  I'm actually thankful that my tendency to rush and get everything done as soon as I possibly can is not able to hinder us from the child that is supposed to be ours, because God will allow whatever is necessary to make the timing right!  We have an amazing God!


          Just as a general update, now we're just waiting for these corrections to be made, have the documents apostilled again and send them to our agency.  Then they will be able to send them on to Russia.  On another note, we have received an appointment from USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) to be fingerprinted next week.  This is an important step in receiving permission to bring a child into the country!  Lastly, we are working on preparing for our second Adotion Benefit Yard Sale, coming up May 26th!

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